Thursday, February 16, 2017

Entry #2

so it happened again..

I was in a community center or resort of some sort, and they were playing a movie on a big screen. I was sitting with family and my wife (or girlfriend, not sure). She was pregnant, due any day.

I wanted a better view of the screen so I left my seat and ran over to the other side. Before the movie ended, I wanted to see my family again, but when I went over there I couldn't find them.

I walked around a bit, and found a room with some of my old highschool buddies. They offered me a beer, and I tried to sit down but was feeling dizzy. I then blacked out.

What followed seemed like an operation of some sort. I was still dazed, but could feel everything. There were long needles, going into my body from various points and angles, one at a time. They all seemed to go to the same area in which I had dream I was anally probed and something was inserted there. It was very painful and I screamed uncontrollably. I remember one had to go through my throat area, but this time they had numbed the area so it didn't hurt as much. I also had a vision that my wife had given birth, and it was a boy.

Next thing you know, it felt like I was in a ditch, floating in water. I could hear my roommate (in real life) mumbling, so I'm guessing I was in a lesser state of sleep. But this did not last too long.

My family had found me, and my wife was sitting there handing me our baby. She had given birth while I had been blacked out. But it wasn't a boy, but a baby girl. I cried as I held her.

The last part of the dream was spent trying to explain to my family the dream inside the dream.

I woke up, in real life this time and could still feel the sensations lingering in my body. A bit shaky, but I took a shower and decided to write this down.

The schizophrenia acted accordingly afterwords as well. But no point in questioning them for an answer.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you so much for sharing avyon. You have described the undescrible-able. You have given words to something I have never been able to convey. This video is very important for people who suffer from schizophrenia.

    It is equally important for family, friends, doctors, etc to have some understanding of what you are going through. Thanks also for going over akathesisa. I agree that it is the worse side-effect ever. I too had it for years before learning it was akathesia. It was a life-changing move. the restlessness was intolerable and I dont know how much longer I could take it.